From the blue, Mind of a Mouse sent me this post, which was very splendid of her and rescues me from my current postless dessert.
I have mentioned my terribly interesting life getting in the way of my Blog, but I hope to have a post for the weekend. Meanwhile Mouse has reminded me of Guesting and I hereby invite submissions from anyone who wishes to offer a guest post. The only stipulation is that it must have some humour and at least one picture. Priority will go to posts with gratuitous sexual references! I may also defile them with my own cartoons if time permits.
Meanwhile, do enjoy these delightful Mouse droppings 🙂
Mind of a Mouse Guest Spot
RoS aka Fierce Panda aka PandaShakes is off saving the world or something – simply too busy to write even a short post for his lowly followers. But I find my day is not quite complete without a Panda Rant to liven the dull hours. So, in the spirit of self-preservation, and aggrandizement, I have decided to write one for him.
Now then – in order to successfully imitate a blogger, a vast amount of research must be done. Every post must be analyzed with attention to the lowest detail. I have spent an ENTIRE ten minutes doing this and I can tell you, it was exhausting, and frankly, a little disgusting. That Panda mind is a dirty one.
I have determined that there are three areas in which a bloggers individual personality shines through.
First and foremost – image choice. As true Panda followers are aware – he creates all of his own images for his blogs (or else shamelessly poaches, then alters them) So I have had to do the same. You will notice the disparity of quality. I leave it to the reader to decide in which direction the disparity lies. (or you might notice my clever plagiarizing skills – all in the name of flattery – I swear!)
The Second area of blogger-nality, is word choice. I have gone through each and every one of Panda’s posts and carefully noted the frequency of certain word choices. (I’m lying again. I went to http://www.wordle.net and asked it – very nicely – to create a word cloud for me) And here is what I (it) found:
Unsurprisingly, Panda’s favorite word is ‘Things.’ I think it is very important to note the pluralization of that word. The word Thing all on its own might imply a lonely soul, or the mind of an obsessive pencil-sharpener, or a mass-murder. But ‘Things’ plural, well, that is truly enlightening. Someday I will share with you all just how enlightening the word ‘Things’ truly is, but I just don’t have room in this infinitely scrolling post to do it justice.
I’m not sure why only one of his brilliant blogging terms, namely ‘neoblogism‘, came up in the cloud. †I find myself using his words, especially the word ‘Blend’ (Blog-Friend) all the time. †Even in conversations with non-bloggers. (And then I have to explain how I learned the word from a panda, which is, really, really, odd.)
Third (and thankfully last) is the area of Subject Matter. Our dear Panda is a rather political bear, and as such knows lots of stuff about that little government over on that little island he lives on. They still have a queen or something quaint like that, right? And a very handsome, newly married Prince? So adorable. I tried to watch some videos of their ‘Parliament’ in session, but I think I kept clicking on some sort of verbal ‘Fight Club.’ There was a lot of odd grunting and verbal abuse flying around and not a lot of sense.
But I guess this is why we need Panda. His informed rants about the British government give me a sense of what is going on over there across the pond. And make me feel connected to a country that I know, sadly, very little about.
Well, I hope if nothing else – this post will encourage Panda to drop everything he is doing (Work, Caring for his Family, Living in the real world) and come back to us. And save his followers from the horror of sitting through my lame imitations.†We Miss You, Panda!