While you are wrong and I am right
You play in a diminished key
To my major melody
In a painful cacophony
Our notes a loud
While you are right and I am wrong
My minor line coaxes tears
While your dominant scale sneers
In an assault on the ears
When we let each other just be
I lift on the coda of yours
You rise as my semi-tone soars
Our lone notes will float into chords
The real beauty
Well said. Relationships as music. I am going to have to reblog this. Just lovely.
You’re too nice – quickly, leave some profanity on my post!
Sure–happy to oblige–
Shit, fuck, dammit! Better? 😀
Thanks for inducing another grin!
Reblogged this on Susan Daniels Poetry and commented:
Lovely and the form fits well–
Thank you JC, I’m glad you like it 🙂
I feel somewhat like a fish out of water when I read what you write.
Many voices make a choir Rambly, in our own dialects we swim the same sea 🙂
Could I have mixed my metaphor more?!
Reblogged this on Ramblings From A Mum and commented:
Please visit this amazingly talented writer.
Thanks for the re-blogs Rambly, and the compliment – you are very lovely 🙂
I say it like it is…You iz what you iz …nuttin more..nuttin less 🙂
How’s that for a grasp on the English language!
you’re most welcome and thank you also 🙂
I like the name Rambly btw – I have had many a nick- name since I commenced.
Still want your ideas for something to write btw 😉
How about tips for mums – make it silly – 1) don’t throw your babies out the window to stop them crying! etc. 😉
damn it want to correct my typos again? lol
Typo’s ….you’re special 🙂 oh and morning 🙂
Hmm ok done 🙂 If you come up with anymore please feel free – as I can write 20 in a day – probably insignificant BS dribble but I like the idea of having ideas from others. 🙂
Pssst go back to ” I need help” I have a ?
I need singing lessons. Or poetry lessons
Learn by doing 🙂
(But usually best to do it in private 😉 )
Writing’s easy to do in relative privacy. I think some of my haikus aren’t half bad.
Singing? Hard to do that without making a noise
Actually I’m not that bad. My ex used to do pro/am with the ENO. and she told me I have a pleasing bass voice. she was kind enough not to point out that at times of stress I have to go baritone when I can’t hit the low notes. Note to self. Give up smoking 😉
Oh, that’s nifty. Thanks.
oh wow this is brilliant. I love it!!! you use simple words to convey such beautiful and complex ideas.
Thank you so much Keren, I’m glad it connected with you 🙂
Bravo! Encore! love this. Sorry I have not gotten back to you about Christmas. I moved this week and am busy unpacking boxes full of stuff I do not even remember having. Absurd how much I have accumulated even though I constantly give away STUFF I am not using. Will be in touch when I find my other black shoe and some unmentionables. happy hugs, pat
Pat I think you’ve had quite enough to deal with. To set your mind at ease, stuff breeds! You put a case in the attic and next month you find a case and a shoe-box. A month later two cases and a bin-liner. It’s some weird auto-genesis!
Good luck with your unmentionables and we’ll speak soon 🙂