I’m dead – So are the Hamsters – So is my son. Are you happy now!

This people, this is what you did. I warned you, but Mobious, Lynette, Combat and Sophia did it anyway.

Are you laughing now! Are you, you sick bastards!!

All over the house are dead hamsters. My son was so devastated he dug the shotgun out from the under-stairs cupboard. I’d take a photograph of his corpse to further shame you, but it’s kind of spread all over the walls and floor and I can’t get it into a single shot (something he was plainly able to manage).

Are you proud? Are you happy now? You sicken me!

But don’t think you’re going to get away with it, because it’s far from over – for I have this:

“I am gonna fuck you up, hamster killers!”

Yeah. Watch your backs.

And just to show you their spirit isn’t broken, my last living hamster has a message for you – so heed!

“You see what I’m doing? Yeah, you know what I’m doing. This is why you hate us, because we can… read it and weep. You may have left me alone, but I can still get some… ha ha ha ha ha!!!”

30 thoughts on “I’m dead – So are the Hamsters – So is my son. Are you happy now!

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      1. hahaha!!!
        (currently I am suffering – ok not suffering – but am inflicted with laryngitis – and I am sure my family is actually quite pleased about this – anyways…) when I laugh I sound like a hamster… which then makes me feel sad for all the poor little dead beasties over your way…. sniff, sniff ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

        remind me why was I laughing ??? oh right you’re twisted, and can’t even deny it!!!

    1. Of course – I flushed the real ones – how sick do you think I am – I’m gonna keep corpses in the house and take photos?! Your twisted.
      Guinea pigs are nothing compared to a fully armed War-Hamster. Your bunnies are mine!
      (did you know the whole on-line game ‘War Hammer’ only came about through a typo – it would have been much better in it’s original rodent form.)

      1. Hey, I had an enema only yesterday – my plumbing is beautiful.
        My compost heap on the other hand is being optioned for the next SAW movie…
        The ammo? From small arms dealers of course!

      2. Ew. You are one sick bastard! Those poor dead hamsters being flushed out of your plumbing…I have to hope it was a self-administered enema – what would a doctor say about the hamsters?

      1. You can keep “I’m blind in one eye, ill throw food at you and other crap whilst you sleep because I want to play, and I don’t need you as a friend just your dog” chinchilla. I don’t need his attitude here.


      2. Gosh, I’d always thought you went into a rabbit hole…
        I’m sure the queen was none too impressed either, although it would explain her increasingly cross face of late on our stamps.

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