They’re switching off my life support machine so I die.

DO NOT LIKE THIS PAGE!!

Just one Like people is all it’ll take…

I mean it, do not press like. For every like on this page I will kill one of my son’s hamsters.

This is a test page to catch those gits who like stuff and never read it. So, not only will they be bloody rude, but they’ll have killed a hamster and broken my son’s heart.

All these warnings come early enough to appear in the reader – deliberately. So likers will not even be looking. That’s how crap they’ll be.

Bastards!

I mean, seriously. The title says I’m going to die, the first line says do not press like. Anyone who presses like is either not reading it or is evil.

Anyway. Just so you know, I’m losing my computer for the weekend so won’t be around. I have lined up a couple of Blog Tips posts in the scheduler, as I know some of you will not survive without them. I am all about the love.

If you want to acknowledge this page and how funny I am, comment, BUT DO NOT LIKE. I will hate you.

Seriously.

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49 thoughts on “They’re switching off my life support machine so I die.

Add yours

  1. Dammit! I was so confused. I know you are always joking so I wasn’t sure if you really wanted me to like the blog or not. Ugh… This sucks – I can’t believe I just killed a friggin’ hamster. That just not cool πŸ˜‰ I am also not good at following instructions. Really. Ask my boss. This is just too much thinking without coffee. What is wrong with me?! I am tempted to “unlike” but now I am just being rebellious….

    1. It seems there was a lot of evil – I am appalled, and there will be consequences.
      My weekend has been washed out by the weather – it’s rained for 12 hrs. So hamster themed vengeance will come! πŸ˜‰

  2. I am so tempted to click that like button. I don’t like hamsters and I am truly evil. But I wont, for your son’s sake. I am, however, going to point out that you made a grammatical error in your title. *evil giggle*

      1. They’re just rats with short tails. Shudder!

        I didn’t Like earlier because I am a coward who is concerned your readers might think I was a bit unhinged and a liar is more likeable than an evil hamster-hating person. Turns out I needn’t have worried and I’ve officially Liked πŸ™‚

  3. I am negatively affected by not being able to read you until your life support is rebooted. How long will it take until you’re live again? Sorry, I don’t care as much about the hamster . . . or the like button.

      1. Tu sychophanto cognito ergo sum. Res ipsa loquitor. (My best shot at: Whatever you perceive it to be, it will be. It speaks for itself). Go write somethin’ will ya? Your adoring masses await the next stroke of your pen. How’s that for a suck-up?

  4. Your poor son. By the way, probably not a good idea to flush the hammies, or you will be paying a steep plumbing bill, unless you chop them to bits first. Don’t tell me–I don’t want to know.

    1. Hey, I’m on a budget here (as opposed to last week, when I was on a budgie – shit, Ryan Air are taking their cheap flights too far).
      I could manage a snuff gallery, hope that was enough πŸ˜‰

  5. I see this as a clever way of “outing” the evil Tory bastards you mentioned in a previous post. Now that you have them in your sights, unleash the hordes of combat hamsters into their home – let the poetic justice begin!

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